Thursday, August 4, 2011

Reading

First off thanks to Aparna for making me think about this. Oh, the memories are sweet.
Before I get to myself, I should mention this about you, my dear children.
K and N, in case you wonder what is it that you read by yourself,
K, you started reading Walt Disney's amazing stories collection gifted to you by your beloved Aunt was one of the first books you sat down and perused by yourself. Of course you weren't reading dear. You were three odd years old then. Your mom would tell you the stories of Snow white and Simba that you would hear with rapt attention and later on, you would sit down with the book and browse the pages, looking at those lovely pictures in their vivid glory. I can only imagine that the story was running in your ultra vast landscape of your mind as a movie! I knew then and to my pride that you were a reader and you were set for life. You are five now when am writing this and books have become your good company. You still cannot read by yourself, but that has not stopped you from browsing through Amar Chitra Kathas or big volumes of Mahabharata, Ramayana and what not. I cannot wait for the day you can read by yourself and gorge on the minutest details of the books you read! You cherish the stories of Krishna and his antics. You even have a doll of Krishna to whom you do Pujas. Its such an adorable sight to watch you do your pujas to the tiny doll, bathe him, robe him and adorn him with flowers and erm... talcum powder. :) Its surprising where you got that from since we dont use talcum powder on you. Ah, must be the gramps. I digress. But its a happy moment that I discovered that you liked to read.
N, boy, you are two, and believe it or not!, you started reading when you were barely one and a half! You would sit in a corner, pick a small "Papa tell me a story" or Bubbles book and browse the books. Your favourites were peekaboo books . They are things with flaps in each page and hidden characters behind the flap. You loved playing peekaboo with the books. Thats how you started with books. There would be times when we would suddenly realize you were missing in action and a quick search would find you sitting by the bookshelves or wherever you find a book(oh they used to be lying around anywhere in the house. Under the bed, in the ward robe, behind doors). We once found you sitting behind a door almost near the hinges and with a book! At times we would even find you mumbling a story to yourself! Your diction is still all baby babbles and its so lovely to hear you say a story. It would be game time for us to guess what story you were saying. Your intonations would often give away how your mother would narrate the stories and mom would guess it easily. You are two now boy and the habit still lingers. Hang on to that boy. Anyone who reads gets a lot of respect in this world.
Now, you would be wondering so where did I start? My introduction to stories goes to your grandfather(my father). Your grandfather, god bless him, has an amazing repertoire of stories that you would find in no book! Ask him and he would say he made up half of them! Guess he would have made a good pile of cash had he thought that he wrote them and not 'made them up'. He still remembers most of the stories and I would often go blank when he would narrate them to you K. N boy has not started listening to his gramps' stories yet. I would sit with you and listen to the stories from gramps all over again. I would become this small boy who would pester his father to tell him a story!
There was a weekly that we used to subscribe when I was a small boy. It was called Illustrated Weekly. They used to publish Phantom comics every Thursday! I used to wait for Thursday and pester your gramps to read them to me! That was the first introduction to comics and super heroes. He was the ideal super hero! A cloaked common man who fights for the good of all! The weekly was the luxury of comics we enjoyed at home. Later on, I discovered that my cousin brother had a whole bunch of Amar Chitra Kathas Collections and I used to devour them during each trip to my uncles place. I vividly remember borrowing and returning them dog eared much to my uncle's consternation. I realize now how enraged he would have been.
Then, as I grew older, I joined a lending library and discovered a whole new big comic book that had the name Tintin! The first book i read was a book named Tintin and the Redrackham's treasure! I was hooked! I stopped only after finishing the series. Asterix would follow much later!
Then, it was my sister's turn to introduce me to novels. She once brought a book that went by the title "Famous five ....." by an author named Enid Blyton. She told me to start reading. I reluctantly obliged and I soon started making more and more trips to the library! I would get five rupees each week to rent books. I would eagerly wait for the Saturday to come and furiously pedal off to the library for books. Soon, famous five led to Secret Seven and Nancy drew. By this time, we had library hour in school where we were allowed to spend an hour . I was overjoyed when I discovered that when we were told that we would be issued library cards and we could borrow books from school!
"Borrow books from school? Any book? wow! " I was double thrilled. Soon, I was borrowing Hardy Boys from school and other books from the local lending library! I remember I used to devour books each week at the expense of many a homework! :)
Soon, I found some boy in the class would read the same book session after session. Some would even pass it around only after reading a few pages. I never bothered for a long time. Soon, i found out that the book was by an author by name Sidney Sheldon ! That introduced me to the wonderful world of fiction for grown ups!.

You know why I read?
The one major reason why I love reading is that it helps me dream! It helps me create this lovely world in mind and watch the plot unfurl in that. If you ever watch a movie by name Inception, you'd know what i mean.  Reading a book brings me tantalizingly close to what the movie as all about. Building an imaginary world and living in it while the story is enacted around you!
The other thing I've been benefited by reading books is learning the usage of English language. English at school is all about nouns, prepositions, similes and all such gobbledygook. Finally, when it comes to language as it is spoken out there in the world, or conversational English, fiction is the best choice !
World affairs! Believe it or not! I'm not big on Malayala Manoramas or Britannicas. I derive my knowledge of places and monuments from novels. Long long back, before the days of Internet(yeah there existed such a time!),  I once surprised a friend who had returned from US and was showing me pictures from his trip and I surprised him my perfectly naming the Jefferson monument, the house of representatives and Lincoln memorial! This, without having seen a single picture of these before in my life! He was stunned! He refused to believe that I had not visited the states before!
Another reason? well, the thrill of buying a book and smelling the smell of fresh paper is something that by itself can be a reason for being a reader.
So, there, you have it, the reasons for my loving reading!!!!


My father asked me to read these books once in my life and I ask you to read them too!
1. The Count of Monte Christo, Alexandre Dumas (unabgridged)
2. A Bend in the Ganges (Manohar Malgaonkar)
3. The Rise and Fall of Roman Empire (Edward Gibbon)

I add two, just two more to this list as I do not want to make a big one
4. India after Gandhi. Ramachandra Guha (hopefully, our history books get revised to reflect the contents of this book by the time you read this)
5. The harry potter series.

So, Vidya whats yours?

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Tag - 5 things Fatherhood taught me

I have been tackled by two ladies Aparna and Aparna (yeah like Thomson and Thompson..with a P) and I see no way out. Boo hoo... this is the end of me.
What the heck would have fatherhood taught me? I 'meet' my children for 3 hours in a weekday and on weekends. If I were to compare my timeshare.. mommy would label me as an acquaintance at best. What do I know about parenthood.
Alright..now that I have tread upon myself.. here are some points.
1. The first thing I have learnt about parenthood is a quantum leap in respect for the mother. It frankly is surprising how a tigress whom you married would change into Mother Teresa after a baby. Her patience, tolerance and unstinting drive to support the children's needs, shocks , stuns and humbles you. The man, seeing this, understands that the bonding that began with a marriage has transformed into a family and tries to play a supporting role to the mother.

2. The second thing it has taught me is humility. I used to pride myself as a man of patience. My children have really put me to test and made me realize that I do not even qualify on the board of  'men with patience'. Not that I yell and shout at them all the time. I seldom do that. But I accept that my patience gets stretched often to its breaking point.

3. The third thing it has taught me is responsibility. Life is no longer about just me and my wife. We can take care of ourselves.Life is no longer about whether I become a CEO or own a 5000sq ft house. I have realized that when my time comes to depart this world, I'm going to judge myself only by whether I have done justice as a father, husband, son and a spouse. On the top of the list would be the 'father' part. Maximum weightage would be on whether we add two Good, kind, humble, persevering, brave and happy people into this world and that is the only thing that seems to matter the most.

4. The fourth thing that it has taught me is hope. Strange and intangible as it is, love and hope are fickle. They can come and go pretty fast. At many times when you are down and need a pick me up, god...yeah! god... would send my son or daughter out of the blue to just sit on my lap and hug me and plant  a wet kiss on my cheeks  and then suddenly I'd feel like everything would just be alright. My children still believe in me and my family is behind me and I have nothing to worry about. There is definitely hope. I warned you! Its intangible.. this..love and hope.. they can arrive and depart in rather strange ways.

5. The fifth thing it has taught me is to think. This is important for a man because, men do not think beyond the next meal unless its about women or a gadget. Of course, some men many challenge me saying that they are not like that and I do not speak for all men.. Its okay, they are lying.. I digress.  So, my children have really taught me to think long and hard about things I tell them, the values I demonstrate and so on... OK.. who am I kidding..am joking..
The real fifth thing fatherhood has taught me is leadership. Leading by example, showing them the way. Parents are our children's idols till they become old enough to see the better examples in the society :) Until then I realize that I have a huge expectation of setting the bar and touching the bar myself. Which, by itself is a huge ask. Its humbling that an infant would defeat my parents in making me do all the things my parents have been trying to get me to do for two odd decades and my wife for a decade! Strange are the ways of man!

Ok, Aparna and Aparna... don't pounce on me saying that these are not necessarily exclusive to fatherhood. I never claimed as much :) So, who are my victims.... will you stand up please as I call out the name.
Yeah.....

Vidya... of LifeUnderTheSky..... yeeaahhahahahahahahahah... (evil laugh .. in case you dont get it :) )

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Queen's English

What have K&N been up to ? I have been lazy way too long..to fill in on everything. Here is what they are up to.
First N.
Boy has turned two this May and is yet to talk fluently. Having seen K start talking much more fluently at 20 months, this boy is worrying us, people telling us boys are slow notwithstanding. Not that he does not talk at all. here is a summary of his speaking prowess.
You ask him something he answers back in English... the important thing to note is that none of us use English around the house... the other day ... I was holding him and standing by the swimming pool while his sister was at her lessons. Suddenly he goes...pretty loudly ...'whosthat..'... i whip around to see a Pretty Young lady walking by... she turned around to catch me whipping around and god knows what she thought... i did not know whether he was out to damage me that day or not..
When he does not get what he want..or when someone takes his toy his immediate reaction is.. 'Oh no... look....wate.' .. - Translated: Oh No, Look, Wait...
If that phrase does not work...he goes straight to the person and
a) if the person is mother.. he asks to be picked up and then grabs clutches of her hair and yanks it
b) if its any other child, he walks around them beating then..so that they get no chance of defending themselves from a single direction attack.. before they realize it..they would have gotten sematthiya 10 beatings.. all the time his face would show a blank expression.. finally when they start crying.. a sly smile..

He also likes singing.. he will sing to the tune making up gibberish and sometimes surprisingly lucid verses... here is a song
Kwajajeeeeee.... kwaja..
kwajajeeeEEEee..
yaaa gaweeb nawaaaa
aaaa gaweeb  nawaaa
mmm.wa...mmmwa....
kwaja...mm..waaa.
duww me paalaa
.......

in case you dont recognize ... its A.R.Rahman's Kwaja Mere Kwaja from Jhodha Akbar.
The other latest song is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O9KmC1-jGNc
he would open his tiny fingers and go
one wutte..thwoo wutte
feeeega
thwee fow feega
faaaive... feega
seeekch wutte feega
...

but ask him to say one to ten.. he will say that clearly.. only the song he sings like this.. he also likes this sng http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtFXYvNIxws he sings with music and all!

boy has started school ... pre-kg.. at Abhyaas play home. Seems he says bye bye to teachers as soon as he spots them when going to school... when he says bye bye to someone out of the blue.. it translates to .' please go away... i dont want to be around you'.

K, on the other hand spent most of the summer learning swimming! I would take her to the class daily religiously and initially she had major fun with the tube floating in the water and generally playing around. The coaches had a tough time bringing her around to learn swimming. She would either be too friendly with them that she would ignore their coaching attempts or when they try to be even mildly strict she would start wailing at the top of her voice complaining that they are out to get her. Finally, using a mix of carrot and stick she learned swimming strokes. Finally after twenty days they tried removing her floating tube and it was wailing all over again! boy it was heart breaking watching her sink, gasp for breath and flail around desperately looking for help when none would come.
Someone told me once that all mammals know swimming thanks to their time in their mother's uterus. The skill just becomes dormant it after they are born. When learning swimming at some point this dormant skill is woken up and suddenly things fall in place. This is how it happened for many children who were learning with Kriti. They all would suddenly for no obvious reason start doing it correctly when swimming without the tube. Same happened for Kriti. One fine day she just started swimming even without the tube and she herself could not believe that she was able to swim and smiling like she had a hangar in her mouth. From then on it was a ride down hill and she picked up back stroke in no time. Now she floats like fish in water and lies on water not moving a muscle. A feat I can't match.
I feel both a  bit of relief and happiness that she climbed the hill and learnt the skill! she has a skill is never going to forget for life in her kitty now. Go girl!

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Does god exist?

Children, I chose to write this in this blog to share what I believe as my own answer to the question that has no definite answer. "Does god exist".If so, where is (s)he. Why is god so exclusive that (s)he manifests only in front of select few. If god did not exist then what about all those historical stories of where sages and demons sought god through severe penance. Does god have form? What form does god have. Do they really have four arms, a dozen heads? Or Are they formless like the prophet says?
On the contrary, if god does not exist, then who created this universe? who created this space? why does space exist? why does time exist? what is the purpose of time? If god exists and (s)he created everything. Why did (s)he have to do it? What does god seek in creating and destroying this universe? What is the ultimate goal? Who created god? The questions go on and on.
History will teach you that whatever god does is nothing short of brilliant even if it is on the wrong side of morals. Gods can do anything and get away with it. Sometimes the stories you will hear will be so lopsided that it will be obvious that at some point it was man made (the story of which god is great involving the triumvirate Brahma Vishnu and Shiva.. check out the shaivite and vaishnavite versions.. the lead character will be so shamelessly lopsided.. the shaivites will say that the argument was between Brahma and Vishnu where Shiva showed his true powers. Vaishnavites' version will be the opposite where Narayana shows his true powers).
I've digressed already. The point being.. how to make some logical sense of this concept of god.

Does god exist in material form? Hold your breath.NO god does not exist in material form, unless proven otherwise in material terms.
Does that mean that i don't believe in god.. It can't be we always thought you believed in god!
The answer is you are right I do believe in God. Read the question above again. I said no only to god's existence in material form.

Lets digress for a moment. Lets take a look at this universe, our own earth. Its been crafted with such beauty and love that nothing is out of place and nothing that exists, exists without a purpose. Nature is brilliantly self servicing! Weeding out its own chaff and sustaining its own grain! Nothing in the world is sustained without its need. Man has inherited that practice. Over the several thousand years, man has sustained only what he needs while  losing practices he does not need. God is one such practice that man needs.
Man needs god and therefore god exists! That , one short sentence,  is my belief of god. So, why does man need god? Is it for the protection from the evil dictator that rules your land? or is to give us a remedy to common cold? Actually, none of these are things god gives man.

What does god give man? We have always known the answer to it. To understand what am about to say, Just put yourself in a situation you are in after an intense prayer.
  • God gives us immense confidence. Call it a mental boost and call to arms of all positive forces in you. A belief in one's self.
  • God gives us a belief that good will happen. Call it a renewal of trust in fellow men and renewal of optimism. A belief in fellow living beings
  • God gives us humility. This manifests in the form of love, friendship, good will, discipline, principles, charity. one character trait feeding the other. A belief in the simple formula of good begets good.
  • God is therapy. At a time of utter despair god listens to us and helps us offload our sorrows and gives us a small candy of confidence for a better tomorrow. A belief for a better tomorrow.
The reasons i've cited above are the all too simplistic  reasons why I believe we need the gods and why we have gods.
Why do we have so many gods? The answer to that if it helps, why not? why do we have so many kinds of ice creams? so many kinds of music? Is there a limit to something that makes us feel good?   If you are happy eating that one flavour of icecream or one genre of soundtrack all your life. Well, good for you! So, one gods, a thousand gods, its really your choice driven by your needs. That's it!
What about god men? Are they all bad. The answer is no.
Does your god man do magic? Tell you he is god or his protege or his incarnation? then he is a fraud. Do they call themselves baba or ananda or swamy. Stay away from them

There are enough good people that walk this earth singing , narrating stories, conducting prayers and spreading goodwill on this planet without calling themselves gods and these people serve more to the catharsis of human race than anybody else. Go to such people only to listen to good things. Do not go them in search of god. That is not what they are for.
Never seek another human being to reach god. God is always there for you. God is always directly accessible. You just need to pray. How you ask. This is because god is within us. In our minds. Always.You just need to open that locker in your mind to flood it with light of god.
So, there, i've said it. My answer to 'Does god exists'. I know this does not answer everything.These points do not address as to how sages and demons acquired super powers. For that matter, we can even start a separate debate whether demons were a myth in the first place.These do not answer the questions on who created the world, universe, space and time.
If your answer is god created the universe. I'll say you are right. I'll only put in a different way. Whoever thought of this and created this whole universe and the world deserves to be a god. Much the same way we say whoever plays cricket like the way Sachin does, deserves to be called a god of Cricket !
So, children, when you are old enough I hope you will be able to appreciate this and understand what your father thought of the gods of this world.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Kattitude

Mommy and K are at the local supermarket. Regulars they are , they know everybody and the people there make it a point to ask the same boring questions to her each time she goes there. Yesterday she showed them her true colours.

Shopkeeper Guy: Endha school pora nee?
with a scowl on her face (as though saying.. vandhuttiya..??. kelu.. solli tholaikaren..)
Our Young Indira Gandhi: C Section
Shopkeeper  Guy: eh!!!#$@#$@ Endha School pore'nnu kaetten

Our Young I.G: LKG! (scowling further)
Shopkeeper Guy!: ooi... endha school poren'nu kaetta.. LKG'nnu solra?

Our young I.G: mmmph.... adhaan appave sonne'ne... C section'nu yen thiruppi thiruppi kaekkara?

Shopkeeper Guy!: GupShup.....looks at mommy for help
Mommy.. hey,, ozhunga sollu... endha school pora? Bala...
Our Young I.G. With serious look on her face Bala... Vidya.... Mandir...... she turns away and smiles to herself for defeating an adult at his own game :)

She has started realizing already that outsmarting guys is not all that tough!!

Monday, February 7, 2011

Open day at school

Last week, we had an open day at K's school, Bala Vidya Mandir Adyar. They showed us what they are doing in school regards to the educating part. BVM really takes it easy on the children and for most part children are either coloring or playing or doing art work. So, they have fun at school! Big time!
They don't do alphabets/numbers nothing.. no homework and its really easy on the children! They teach them drawing curves and lines and will focus on alphabets next year! Hopefully! :)
I thought well! everything seems hunky dory! Until we got home and missus told me about her trip with K to the loo! Apparently the loo stank! and was revolting ! I was shocked! I always believed that one's house is only as clean as their loo! I cannot somehow accept that children use loos that are filthy. Without getting to the specifics, I came to understand that water was sometimes a problem!
How hygienic is that in a school where hundreds of children study! How are they expected to wash hands etc.,? I'm not even sure if the school will do something if we take the case up with the administration! On one hand, children being children, all of them may not have the best of habits or are in their permanent state of hurry during free hours and may not exercise their best of habits cleaning up after them! But aren't the school housekeeping staff responsible for keeping things spic and span! Is that not a modicum expectation from schools these days? or am I dreaming?

Ntrails

Amma: N, I love you..
N: akthum... awboiuuuu
Amma: Daaai, I love you solluda
N: Abbwaathuleeewarscchh

Amma:eh?
N: adthu..
Amma: I love you solluda'nna..
N: Appuwaa
Amma: Addi vaanguva..
N:Kithika
Amma giving up: Poda..

and she is off doing something else.

Five minutes elapse
N: hummaaaaaaw
Amma:mmm
N: Hummmaaaaaaawww
Amma:MMMMMM??
N:Awaawoooo (I love you..)

Amma is clean bowled... blushes big time and sweeps the boy of his feet and hugs him!!!!
Oh! BTW, all those N talk before Awawooo.. if you are wondering what they mean and you are looking for me to translate... eh eh... we did not understand it either... he speaks really really long sentences of gibberish..

Not even Two and already playing hard to get with women!! From whom did you get those genes from boy?